What Doesn't Kill You....



Hello fellow fairies and welcome back!! Thanks as always for stopping by. We all know the old saying what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. As I sit here and type, I myself am battling or dealing with a situation that is threatening to "kill me". As I mentioned before this year has been hell on earth for me, and as I adjust to my new reality there are things I am forced to deal with that I never thought I would. It's Christmas time and this is the first year I will not get to watch my daughter open presents nor spend time with my in-law family. While that might not be important to some it has meant the world to me over the past six years to be able to spend that time with them. As I move forward having to adjust to no longer being married and now having to share my princess it is taking a strength I never thought I'd need. I've been trying to prepare myself for this time all year because I assumed it will be harder not to see her smiling face on Christmas morning than it's been watching my family fall apart. Da'Haute, what does that have to do with anything? Well honestly the thought alone threatened to "kill me" . The thought alone threatened to destroy my hope that the better or the good in this situation is coming. Now having to actually walk through the situation and live out something that's broken me I know living through even just the thought of it has made me stronger. I still have my moments where pain finds me and I can't hold back tears ( like at this present moment), but I know that as long as I decide to not stay there, it can't "kill me". If I find a way to acknowledge my emotions and allow myself to feel them but not hold on to them I am able to grow and be better in the end. So how does it work? That's exactly how, you allow yourself to feel the emotion, acknowledge it, and then release it. Don't hold on to it. Don't listen to the lies of negativity it tries to feed you. You have to P.U.S.H. ( Pray Until Something Happens) past it. It may not be instantaneous but you will find that you have the strength you need to push through. As I sit here now and wipe the tears from my eyes while remembering the years of fun and laughs I shared with family that I don't have anymore, I must remind myself it won't always be this way. Whether I ever get to spend another Christmas with them or not the pain that comes from missing the experience won't always be. What we don't allow to "kill us", we allow to grow us and make us stronger. It might feel like pain and near death now, but don't allow it to "kill you". Don't allow it to steal your joy, your peace, your drive/ambition, or your sense of who you are. Trust me, I am a living witness that you will be stronger in the end. Until next time keep God first, find your God given lane in life (purpose), get in it, and enjoy the ride!! Love God, love your neighbor, and love yourself!! Be blessed!! 💋💋👸🏾👸🏾

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